To Bothersome

Do people bother you, this may seem an awkward question but none would deny. But is it not awkward that you allow others to bother you, influence your mental-emotional state resulting in annoyance, trouble and worrisome. To name those who bother is an easy say and a convenience for many. But being a bother to others one is quite ignorant and always in denial.  

For those who feel they are never a bother to others allow me to share their condition in a humorous way. An old lady is sitting with the doctor who is on a phone call, once the call got over she says, Doctor, I have a terrible problem with gas, but it doesn’t bother me much. My farts are always silent and never smell. I probably farted several times since I’ve been here & you didn’t realize it. The doctor responds Interesting and writing a prescription asks her to take the pills and come see him in a week. The old lady returns in a week and says, I don’t know what the hell you gave me. My farts are still silent, but my God, they stink!! The doctor says, Excellent now that your sinuses are cleared, let’s work on your hearing.”

No botheration is hard to shake off with, but the right pill of thoughts and actions in one’s mind is required e.g. knowledge is power - if one knows what facts not to bother with. Botheration is a universal experience and more of a personal and subjective feeling. The state of being disturbed, annoyed, or troubled, is often stemming from one’s internal conflicts or external stressors.

Some of the common unrealised botherations': when one is in a state of doubt and uncertainty, but bothers to express doubt in others. Inability to take responsibility one bothers to fault finding in others, a reason for the cause. Not trying to do things yourself and conveniently asking others to do. A disorganized person is busy bothering others to be organized. Feeling insecure one bothers to force a reaction in annoying behaviour to gain attention or exert control in situations. Children particularly are prone to this, as they may not have developed the ability to express their needs or desires in a more appropriate way.

Boredom and jealousy also motivates individuals to bother others. Factors like lack of sleep, stress, or hormonal changes, make individuals more sensitive to small annoyances. Lacking the ability to understand or empathize with others' feelings, makes it difficult for some to perceive the impact of their actions thus engaging in behaviours that are irritating or hurtful without realizing it.

While "bothersome" typically has negative connotations, it can be a positive thing depending on the context. In essence what's often considered "bothersome" can be a source of growth, creativity, and emotional processing. Sadly only few can find a way to navigate these experiences constructively and prioritize one’s own well-being while interacting with others. 

Nothing in this world can bother you as much as your own mind. Wisdom dawns when you realise it is your mind and not the other person.

Writings in scriptures express “Stop allowing the self to be upset. Nothing should bother once you belong to the One, unto whom all things belong and find lasting peace. Those who look alike upon pleasure and pain – anxieties do not touch them. Having obtained this human incarnation without the Naam, it is all futile and useless.

Life can be full of situations that can be annoying troubling and worrisome, seek Divines intervention to clear, heal and release it.